Find Love in 5 Blog Post

If this title makes you mad, you probably better read this quickly …


Loneliness is a ball and chain that hangs in the pit of your stomach and attaches to your mind to drag you down to a dark pit. It swirls its ugly accusations through the passages in your mind and calls you all kinds of ungodly names. Loneliness is real. it is loud. it is dark. And it is a LIAR!

Let’s flip the light switch on!

There are over 7 Billion people on this planet. I bet there are over 100 people who would think you were really awesome if they just got to know you. I bet there are over 100,000 people who would think you were great and want to be with YOU!

So where are they??? Oh, they exist. They are real. They are waiting in the wings for you. However, there is a first step to finding your friends, your buddies, or even the love of your life. Step one is to hang out and appreciate YOU. If you learn this secret, loneliness will NEVER be able to drag you down to it’s slimy pit again.

The truth is… you are always going to be with you. Yes, that is your joy and your life’s dilemma. You cannot escape yourself. So if this is true, how about finding out some really cool things about yourself? How about appreciating the little things about you that make you different from anyone else? And why not also look at the similarities between you and every other human on the planet. It will make you begin to feel connected. We are all human beings. We all have thoughts and feelings. We all live in a physical body that can be challenging at times. We all have the capacity to love and be loved. The truth is, someone loves you. Someone does. There are perfect strangers who are willing to love you exactly as you are. The question is: Are you willing to learn how to love yourself? If you learn this secret you will never remain stuck in the loneliness trap again.

Be kind to yourself. Look at yourself as you would a best friend. Be forgiving toward you. You really have done the best you can with the tools you have had. Now it is time to rise up. It is time to bust out of the chains that loneliness has wrapped around you. It is time to claim back the life that loneliness has squeezed from your heart.

There are plenty of people to connect with on this planet. The first one is you. Find a pen and a sheet of paper and write down 3 things about yourself that you wish people could see in you. What do you wish the world would know about you? Perhaps that you really are kindhearted, or that you are a really great cook, or dancer. You may want them to know you are really smart or really great with children. Write three great things about YOU. Do it now!

Next, make a list of people that you know  you would like to hang out with. Trust that they just might want to hang out with you too. Set up a time to see them in advance. Ask them if they want to grab a cup of coffee or go to a movie sometime. If you know there is a particular night or time when loneliness tries to strike, set up a time to be with people you enjoy during that time. Find a church or civic group that has a cause you are attracted to and begin to get involved. If you find it doesn’t fit, try another one. There are dozens of options for you. You will find one if you get in action.

In the meantime, introduce yourself to YOU. You really are an awesome person, you know … Get to know yourself better. Think about your strengths rather than your weaknesses. See one good thing in yourself every day. Trash the thoughts that bring you down. Words are more powerful than thoughts. So if thoughts are plaguing your mind, SPEAK one positive thing about yourself aloud. You may have to scream it! It is OK. Do whatever it takes to break the cold, icy grip of loneliness.

You have the power. You have choice. When you enjoy your own company, you will never have to feel lonely again. And if you want to be with someone else, there are amazing people waiting to be with you. Let go of the ones who do not celebrate you. Do not waste your time or energy on those who do not appreciate you.

Know that you may have not even met your best friend yet. Perhaps they are right around the bend. And when you meet your very best friend it may surprise you who it is … Any guesses? When you do, you will never have to be lonely again.


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Take care of yourself Be others oriented You have 5 seconds to make a first impression Be authentic Act as if you belong Err on the side of formality Adjust your posture It is better to be overdressed than under-dressed Be grateful Fear is your enemy. Get rid of it. Whoever extends the invitation pays Learn how to introduce yourself Learn how to introduce your date to others Be punctual Make eye contact when you speak You are enough Dress according to the venue Give honor where honor is due Brush up on your dining etiquette Ask permission. Do not assume. Have sufficient money If a phone call drops, whoever initiated it calls back Be clear about where to meet Show respect even if you disagree If someone does not show up in 15 minutes call them. Leave in 30. Let someone know where you are and who you are with Go where you are celebrated, not where you are tolerated Little things make a big difference Be kind Read up on current events Slow down Breathe Feel fabulous Be your best

Action Item: Circle the items on the list above that speak to you right now in this moment. Focus on these and take action to create 2° shifts where needed.

Do it now.
Action is one of the keys to your success.

Our “First Impression Advantage for Dating” audio series and guidebook will transform how you feel about your dating life! You will be more conscious of your first impression and learn how to be comfortable showing the world who YOU are. You will feel your value more deeply and have more clarity concerning what you want and how to get there!

You can begin on the right foot with dating even if you have stepped out on the wrong foot in the past! Are you willing to take the time to invest in yourself so you experience the love you have been searching for?

We want to share our secrets for success with you!

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“I was not planning on being single… but I was…” Jan Goss

Getting back into the dating scene can be intimidating, or at the very least, awkward. In Jan’s NEW series, First Impression Management for Dating, you will find out just HOW to begin again and make that critical first impression the right impression. Whether you choose on-line dating sites or choose to mingle in person to meet that special someone, Jan’s new fresh approach to First Impression Management for Dating is your solution! Click below for additional information on upcoming workshops and training.

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